Carl Sagan: Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.
Sacred cows make the best hamburger.
The Little Bald Bastard: If the human body were intelligently designed, Mr. Heimlich would have died in obscurity.
Theodore Roosevelt: To announce that there must be No criticism of the president, or that we are to stand by the president, right or wrong, is Not only Unpatriotic and servile, but is morally Treasonable to the American public.
Frederick Nietzsche : A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything.
H. L. Mencken : We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.
Benjamin Franklin : The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason.
Mark Twain : It ain't the parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand.
Epicurus : Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?
"The universe was created by an all-powerful all-knowing being who came down to us in the form of a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father who can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree." every Christian who ever lived
Charles MacKay : Of all the offspring of Time, Error is the most ancient, and is so old and familiar an acquaintance, that Truth, when discovered, comes upon most of us like an intruder, and meets the intruder's welcome.
Albert Einstein : Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe.
Thomas Jefferson : Shake off all the fears of servile prejudices, under which weak minds are servilely crouched. Fix reason firmly in her seat, and call on her tribunal for every fact, every opinion. Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason than that of blindfolded fear.
Carl Sagan : It is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring.
PZ Myers: He doesn't understand how bees fly, therefore God exists. The ability to translate ignorance into a sense of wonder must be especially useful to creationists; the world must look like a supernova of wonder to them, with rainbows and dancing ponies and happy clowns doing pirouettes. Listen, people, here's a word of advice: when you find your sense of wonder lighting up at what you don't know instead of the cool stuff in reality that you do know, slap yourself, hard. What you don't know should be a goad to make you try and find out, not an excuse to bliss out and sit drooling into your filet mignon.
Me: I used to be Catholic, but I gave it up for Lent.
Captain Murphy, Sealab 2021 : It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!